You can’t have everything

Balancing between exploring and paying the bills

A push-pull sort of tension I ran into pretty early on this new exploration stint is I kept wanting to do everything. And well, I am one person with 24 hours in a day, so obviously I can’t. Yet somehow I still angsted about it.

On one hand I want to fully immerse myself in this new field I’m training in, including extracurricular activities.

Being still one foot in my first career meant a backup income to fund this new experimental state but it also means a commitment that my other classmates might not necessarily have.

It just became more apparent when horticulture conferences come up (that I couldn’t plan for because I didn’t know their existence) but I already committed to casual shifts at the hospital.

I guess there’s really not a real way out of it.

I did sit down and calculate the bare minimum number of shifts I need to take to make ends meet and cap it at that.

I also tried to look for extra virtual talks that are accessible in the evenings or remotely and then went to ask many workshops outside of school that was also not on a day I work.

Everything’s a balance and I’m getting used to this kind of juggling in this phase of my journey.

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-S

Image credit: Pixabay - user no-longer-here